This Poem was Submitted By: James C. Horak On Date: 2006-10-22 21:38:10 . . . Click Here To Mail this Poem to a Friend!

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Enceinte'

I would be outside the circles         Time has made for thee. For me there is no need to guard,        either gates or their keep Or to lie in toward the intense deny.  For all that man fears most exists,        he does not imagine a cobweb's breath, Without making the spider manifest. In finding the way of why, the curse     of the compulsion awaits nearby. To grasp misdeed with thought not taken,     makes the act just a little longer forsaken. You come to be what you dwell upon too long. The wafer and the cup of wine not excluded. Cortez found that matter well concluded On step stone altars adorned with blood grooves That did not tidy up near as well, as a tiny wafer     and a golden cup wiped dry. 

Copyright © October 2006 James C. Horak


This Poem was Critiqued By: marilyn terwilleger On Date: 2006-10-30 00:15:01
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.81818
JCH....I have read this poem every day since you posted it...well almost every day. I know what enceinte means but it seems to hide inside this poem...which is my fault not yours. Knowing you...no, knowing your writings I believe you have a purpose for every word you write. Not to deceive but to make the reader ponder the meaning of your words. You have written some profound phrases that tease my senses but never completely show themselves to me. For all that man fears most exists, he does not imagine a cobweb's breath, Without making the spider manifest.................these lines are beautiful and I think if I could hear you speak them or was there when you wrote them I could get inside your head. However, I have always believed the the very things we fear the most don't come true. But the next two lines do give me pause. Will we ever know the way of why or will we act with compulsion without first thinking and therefore be longer forsaken? Do we really become what we dwell upon too long? Oh I hope not...some thoughts must be ours alone. I took the bread and wine today but I don't feel holy for doing so. The holiness is not in the cup rather it is inside of us...for the taking. It is late and I should be sleeping but now you have made me think....you should be ashamed of yourself! I hope I haven't butuchered your poem...but you'll forgive me...cuz you love me! Good night....Marilyn


This Poem was Critiqued By: Dellena Rovito On Date: 2006-10-29 14:22:57
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
James, You just gotta keep the old grey matter working! I think you feel like you've stepped out of the safety zone that we are born to. For all that man fears most exists, he does not imagine a cobweb's breath, How true! Usually you can't identify the spider. exist's/breath/manifest are nice together. To grasp misdeed with thought not taken, makes the act just a little longer forsaken. I know so.....if you don't realize the 'sin' why renounce it? Interesting. You come to be what you dwell upon too long. Then I'm sunk cause I've worked long/hard to overcome... not excluding the spiritual life. Really wonderful poem with lots of deep thinking, maybe some day some of it will rub off. hopefully. In anticipation Dellena
This Poem was Critiqued By: Ellen K Lewis On Date: 2006-10-25 07:41:22
Critiquer Rating During Critique: Unknown
James, your poetry is always so deep and thought provoking. You leave me breathless and somewhat frozen in the moment as I finish the last line. Your first verse leaves you without objective or purpose, thought or ideal. Your second verse is intriging. The twist of word play and the sudden rhyme is a nice surprise. For those readers who have to nit pick I would say that the cobweb probably has no breath anyway, but I still like the way you put it. Third verse is really good. Packed with the punch of the whole thought.. The 'way of why' and the 'curse of compulsion' but your last verrse is my favorite! I am exploring the depths of those lines and wonder how many people will feel offended? (not I) You have crossed through the lines of belief's and managed to bring us all in. Your last line, I think, could be interpreted by the masses to believe what they will. Interesting to compare with You come to be what you dwell upon too long. I really enjoyed this piece! Thanks for sharing it. It's great.
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