This Poem was Submitted By: Ryan D Allen On Date: 2004-09-01 00:53:42 . . . Click Here To Mail this Poem to a Friend!To Listen to Music While Reading this Poem, just Click Here!
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Flow?
As I sit down here and write this,
I'm telling you that this poem has no flow to it.
But can a poem have flow to it even when we say
that it doesn't have flow to it? This is bothering me!
I say it has no flow to it but it seems like it has flow to it.
Is this possible? Can this happen?
I don't know how this could happen, that a poem that someone
says has no flow to it has flow to it. Maybe it's the way
we perceive it. I say this has no flow to it, but when I read this
it seems like it does. I don't know maybe I'm just a bad poem writer.
What do you think?
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Copyright © September 2004 Ryan D Allen
This Poem was Critiqued By: Amour Stakwi'a Dresbach On Date: 2004-10-05 10:46:03
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 8.50000
Ah! Here are the thoughts of a poet; the questioning that all of us poets do. I have written several poems on the subject of poetry and I think it is healthy that you have written such a work as this. It does have an element of flow in it. The way a poem is read aloud or read in one's mind can affect flow also. Only a pet can grasp the point you made here or perhaps also a songwriter.
This Poem was Critiqued By: Latorial D. Faison On Date: 2004-10-02 06:57:42
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
Hi Ryan,
You're not a bad poem writer. You're just like the rest of us, you think a lot (smile). This poem is not like a poem, but it really IS a poem (smile) because that's what you have called it.
Poet's like to ask questions, and no one often has the answers to our questions but us. I think that's what takes place in this poem. I think that you have written it in search of something. In fact, you are searching for the answer as to whether this is even feasible, and I'm here to tell you that it is.
And YES, a poem can have flow to it, even if we think that it doesn't. Poetry is interpreted in a myriad of ways, and readers don't often find the author's meaning; however, they try to make sense of poetry as the words unfold within their minds.
I would advise you to continue writing on and to explore all of the foundations and sytles of poetry.
I enjoyed reading this poem because it made me think about the definition of poetry, what makes a poem a poem, and I reflect on the fact that poetic flair and style don't make words become poems. We make them poems.
Thanks for sharing this one at TPL this month. I enjoyed reading it.
Latorial
www.latorial.com
This Poem was Critiqued By: Dellena Rovito On Date: 2004-09-12 19:49:29
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 1.00000
Ryan,
When something flows forth from a person it 'flows'.
[that would be flowing....like words spill out without even much thought]
When you flow, you know.
The above piece had the one flow through thought.....
Good poem/no....no thought for me.
Flowing doesn't mean it's perfect wording. And always a piece can be perfected.
As to if your a poet...yes......as long as you care to be and as long as you must record/write it down, and as long as you have something to say. And as expected, you must feel you are a poet so you can act as one.
[this all just flowed from me]
dellena
This Poem was Critiqued By: DeniMari Z. On Date: 2004-09-12 00:01:07
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
Dear Ryan,
I see how perplexing flow has become to you - I love the humor in this poem. Critics can be tough, but that's just the learning tool to writing - and making it better. Trust me - if it weren't for the tough critics on this site - I'd still be back at square one - but I've moved up to square two.
Basically everything has flow to it - it's the quality of flow - whether it starts and stops at the right places, sounds good while reading aloud - but I'm hoping you know this already and were just making a point
and a very clever one.
Sincerely,
DeniMari
This Poem was Critiqued By: Andrea M. Taylor On Date: 2004-09-09 22:59:08
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 1.00000
You are a man after my own heart. Flow, count, and stanza stamina...Bah Humbug...
Seriously, we ponder, erase and ponder to please...Whom?
Writer's cramp or writer's tramp...that is the question. Does a blind man have perception or does he feel his way through? This is a long standing debate...so sit and write and let the debators get elected.
If there is a vent...the air will flow. So vent, write, feel and do what comes naturally. Enjoyable fun read.
Thanks.
This Poem was Critiqued By: marilyn terwilleger On Date: 2004-09-09 14:40:30
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
Hi Ryan,
What do I think?? I think this is hilarious!! I read it several times and each time
it was funnier than the first. Welcome to TPL..hope you like us and hope you will stay
with us. Poets, in general, have a tendancy to write with a lot of pathos about dire
situations and circumstances and it is such a joy to find a poem, such as you have written,
to brighten our day. Keep writing and keep posting your work...I will watch for your
next poem!
Peace....Marilyn
This Poem was Critiqued By: arnie s WACHMAN On Date: 2004-09-05 16:43:42
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 1.00000
I say you have the rudiments of a thinker poet. Your poem runs from flow to flow. You use a
double negative. It's only you that can say it works (flows) well or not. Guess you will have
to see what others think. I don't remember seeing your poetry before, but keep it coming, and
thanks for posting. P.S. You are the writer, so if you say it doesn't flow, who am I to argue?
This Poem was Critiqued By: Turner Lee Williams On Date: 2004-09-02 14:08:27
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 1.00000
Andy–This is the first time I believe I’ve seen your work. I perused your poem and
think it has potential, but it’s not my intentions to rewrite anyone’s offering. This
piece requires a lot of work: the repetition of phrases is a tab bit overdone; not sure
if the title should be a question or exclamation. The second to last line is something
you’ll have to address personally through an inner search (I’m not in a position to
make the decision for you). I totally enjoyed the rhetorical question ask by the last
line. And, the effort did touch me on some emotional level. Thanks for sharing. TLW
This Poem was Critiqued By: James Edward Schanne On Date: 2004-09-01 10:01:14
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 1.00000
reading this I wonder if -down here- in the first line is really needed and if -to it- after flow is needed as well although perhaps your going for a certain effect thats escaping me. Thanks for letting me read poem
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