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Consoling Life Two summers ago was crazy. It seemed like everything was different. People were growing up. People were changing. They were indeed changing, and not for the better. It was the summer I grew up. I remember sitting at that park bench. The trees lined the sidewalk as the sun was soothing as it passed from blinding to magic. I sat and waited, James said he had to talk to me. I lit a cigarette and waited. James came was in the distance and getting closer. I had to wait no more. . “Hey Man, How ya doin?”, I asked. James Paused hesitantly, “Did you ever hang out with Ann Woodway?” “I don’t Know, maybe met her briefly once.” I replied. James peered into my soul. “You sure man, you never hung out with her?” James put his arm around me and sat down. “I don’t know what did she look like?” I felt the tension in James arm something was not right. “She was kind of a metal chick… umm, she was short and skinny with long black hair” James described her with such detail, too bad she looked so generic. “I’m not sure I maybe met her briefly; actually yea I think I met her once through you.” I said. “Yea, she was one of my best friends in high school… Joe called me last night and said that Ann had passed… I didn’t know what to say… I never cry… But I don’t know” Here he was my best friend pouring out his heart and soul and all I could say. “I know this is sort of an awkward question, but do you know how?” “She basically got screwed to death.” “What?!?” I exclaimed. “Not literally screwed to death, but a shitty series of events one after the next… She got fired from the nursing home she worked at for 3 years for some minor infraction. Apparently one of her coworkers had it out for her. It just sucks. Then her boyfriend of four years breaks up with her and then her step dad cancels her car insurance. Plus on top of it all she had some serious medical issues. And I know when she gets depressed she can get self destructive.” I couldn’t help but try to sympathies, but I didn’t know how. “Man seems to be the same story with everyone lately” I said. “They haven’t gotten any toxin analysis results back but I’m pretty sure it was an over dose. She liked her pain killers.” That was the third person I heard about over dosing; it seemed to be a trend. “Sucks man, seems like everyone is OD’ing these days, shit remember Chris OD’d on coke 2 months ago… shit… So what have you been getting into today?” I asked trying to lighten the mood. “Just working on some work and trying to keep my mind off of things.” James replied. “That’s good” I said. Then James continued. “Yeah I ate two and a half clonazepam… then I remembered Ann gave me my first.” I still had no idea how to express myself. “Dang man, that’s no good that stuff always, puts me in a funk. Makes me all suicidal” “It seems to be working for me… You know, we were best friends… just sorta fell out of contact the past year… If only”. I finally understood the feeling. “Your thinking if you didn’t loose contact those things would be different.” “Exactly” James said. Finally everything clicked and I could relate. “Well try not to think of it like that. Things happen the way they do. There is nothing you really could have done.” I reached into my pocket for another smoke. “I suppose your right Nick, but do you think I could bum a cigarette. James said. I was satisfied with my newly gained wisdom, and for once didn’t giving away my last cigarette. |
Additional Notes:
there are deliberate misspellings and odd punctuations
This Poem was Critiqued By: cheyenne smyth On Date: 2012-06-28 10:44:51
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
Hi Andrew,
First of all let me welcome you to TPL. I have read this piece of prose with great interest. However, I had to scroll from side to side to read some of the very long lines which was a bit distracting. I like the conversation which was so real in my mind. There are so many that OD in this time and age, many more than when I grew up. I think you should use another format, perhaps quatrains would work here or maybe you could use 10 beats per line and there is no need to rhyme. You have used good word choices to get your point across.
Best wishes,
cheyenne